Friday 24th April

About a year ago, I bought a cool pair of jeans from TradeMe.
They were a size 22, and they didn't fit.
I was gutted.....
But, the seller had a range of other sizes, so I sucked it up and bought a pair of size 24's as well.
The 24's fit well, and I LOVED those jeans!!!
Just before my surgery, they were on the verge of being cast aside as they were getting too tight, in fact, I wore them home from the hospital after surgery, and had to take them off as soon as I got to the motel, as they were just too damn tight.
Anyway........... last week, I gave them away.  
They were baggy as hell, I needed a belt to keep them up and I could take them off without undoing them, so it was time for them to go.
Then this morning, as I was rummaging in my drawer trying to find something to wear, I found the smaller size!
I was thrilled to see that they fit, and the zip did up no problems at all.
Today, I have had three people tell me that my prized jeans are too big and baggy and that I need to get a smaller size!!!
Hahahahahahaha............ These ARE the smaller size people!!!!
Ah well, might be time to hand these ones on as well soon me thinks :)

Now....... I have some stuff floating around in my head that I really want to get out.....
A lot of it has come about from the tv programme "Fat Doctor" that is currently screening on Prime TV here in New Zealand on a Thursday night.
I have had a lot of people lately tell me how "lucky" I am to have had the surgery, and that I am also "lucky" that I never have to worry about food again.
YEAH RIGHT!!!
I just want to say here and now, that this lifestyle is far from "lucky" - if that makes sense?
The decision to have the surgery for me, was a bloody hard one.  It took years for me to finally acknowledge that I needed it.
Once I had done that, it was relatively easy for me to say yes - I admit that.
I was fortunate enough that I never really had a fear of not making it through the surgery..... I always knew that I was going to wake up, so I had no fear of dying.
I know that there was a LOT of head work that needed to be done in preparation for this surgery, and I also know that it will be an ongoing battle for the rest of my life - I accept all of that.
What I wasn't prepared for however, was the physical side of things.
If you think that never feeling hungry is good - then sure - I may be "lucky", as I rarely feel hunger anymore.
But....... eating is no longer a joy for me at all.  It is a chore that I would rather do without, and if someone had told me that I would be feeling this way 6 months ago, I would have doubted them completely.
My life used to revolve around food.  Now, food is just a bit of a pain in the arse to be honest!  It HAS to be endured, and more often than not, it makes me sick.
Some people are very very lucky after surgery, and can eat anything they choose without suffering any side effects.
I am not one of those people.
Take yesterday for example......
I felt "yuck" all morning, and couldn't eat breakfast, so I had a coffee.
Jeremy took me out for lunch, and I chose Sushi, because I KNOW that I can eat two pieces of Sushi without a problem - and I LOVE it.
Yesterday, my body decided that it wouldn't cooperate anymore, and the ONE PIECE of Sushi that I had eaten, came back up within about 5 minutes.
No reason..... I had chewed it thoroughly, I had eaten it slowly, I didn't drink while I was eating it.
It simply didn't sit right, and I vomited.   Luckily we hadn't been able to find a seat in the food court, and had got a takeaway and taken it home.
Imagine if we were at the Foodcourt?  I would have had to run to the toilet and "do the deed" in a cubicle..... *shudder*
At this stage of the journey, I can not say wholeheartedly that I am 100% happy with my decision to go ahead with the surgery.
Hopefully in a few months time I will be able to say that I am happy....... I am hoping that as time goes by I will be able to tolerate a wider variety of foods.
Don't get me wrong..... I don't regret having the surgery, but I have to say that it is bloody hard when you know that anything you eat is going to make you feel sick.  Not always to the point of vomiting, those times are getting less frequent (THANK GOD!!!) but I feel a certain degree of nausea after every single thing that I eat.....
Yes - I will be talking to the nutritionist at my next appointment, but after talking to a few others that have had the surgery through an on-line forum, it is just luck of the draw......
So, do I count myself "lucky" that I have had the surgery???
No.
Not yet.
But maybe one day I will.
Am I happy with the surgery?
Most of the time....... and that, at this stage, is enough.

Plans for this weekend will include:
PAINTING!
Ugh!!!
Happy to say though, that I should be completely finished the 4th bedroom this weekend - YAY!!!!!
Then, that will mean, that while Jeremy and his dad are concentrating on getting walls in the kitchen, dining room and lounge ready for painting, I can get the other side of the house sorted out and cleaned of all the plaster dust that is currently covering EVERYTHING!!  Yuck!!!!!
It's gonna be a busy weekend, but I am actually looking forward to it....... I must be crazy!  :)

Got the quote back from the air conditioning people for the heat pumps, and they have basically told us that having a heat pump in the hall way will be a waste of time and money!  
The house is an odd shape, and the guy said that if we put one in the hallway, it wouldn't heat the bedrooms at all...... BUGGER!
So, a friend has suggested maybe looking at a nightstore heater in the hallway instead.... not sure if that would be any better for getting heat in to the bedrooms, but I guess the question is worth asking.
At least we know what we need for the lounge and kitchen area, and we can now work out some figures and GO SHOPPING!!!
YAY!

Righto - best I get back to work....... it's been a busy morning, and I still have a heap to do this afternoon.....

Have a great weekend everyone :)