Monday 12th September 2011

Week 3 - Day 1

90.3kg

OK - so my weight is back to where I started from 2 weeks ago....
Yeah, I'm pissed at myself for that, but I'm also gonna ease up on the blame game too...
I've had a shit of a time lately, you all know that, and I put WAAAAAY too much pressure on myself to be everything to everyone, and nothing to myself... if that makes sense?
So.... I'm back in the game mentally (I think) and I know that this is something that I want physically - cos lets face facts..... I want to LOOK better!
I'm feeling better about things, I've asked for help, I'm getting help, and it's time to put everything into perspective and treat myself well.
Which is just what I intend on doing....

After seeing my Doctor on Friday, she diagnosed me with a case of Post Natal Depression, caused basically by a lack of sleep!
No Shit Sherlock!! hehehehehe......
So..... she gave me a heap of suggestions as to what to do with Jaynie, and she also gave me a prescription for a low dose of Prozac..... my new best friend!
And, I have to tell ya, I'm feeling better already!
The little things that were getting me down, are no longer at the front of my mind...
For example, I actually left washing unfolded and hanging on the clothes drying rack this morning....
I didn't have the overwhelming NEED to fold it and put it away out of sight...
OK, so I still made the beds before I walked out the door, but the washing thing is a HUGE deal for me and my OCD tendencies!
Oh yeah.... and just as an aside..... Prozac is commonly prescribed to OCD sufferers!
Go figure!

Anyway..... my Doctor also suggested switching Jaynie to a formula for "Hungry Babies" since she is obviously waking for hunger reasons through the night, and she also suggested introducing solids through the day as well...
Jaynie is already taking veges at night, so I started her on a bit of baby rice for breakfast on Saturday, and although to start with, she was a bit wary, after a few mouthfuls she was opening her mouth looking for more!
I didn't see any change on Saturday night with her, and she was up 4 or 5 times (I lost count), but last night, she only woke once at 2am, and then again at 5.30am to start her day :)
I "think" she went to bed at about 8pm last night??
I'm not sure, cos Jeremy took over, I went to bed, and he fed her and settled her down for the night... YAY!

Mum & Dad were here for the weekend, and it was fabulous just having an extra pair (or two) of hands around the place!
They came to Rhian's swimming lessons, and she loved that, showing off for anyone who would take any notice!!
We all went to Jeremy's Dads place for dinner on Saturday night, and then Mum, Rhian, Jaynie and I went shopping on Sunday.... it was fabulous!
Jaynie took one look at Dad on Saturday morning when they turned up, and burst in to tears, but by the end of the weekend they were getting on just fine, and he even managed to feed her a bottle without any tears!!
As usual, I am totally gutted that I didn't have the camera out... I managed to get one photo of dad feeding Jaynie yesterday, but for the most part, the camera was forgotten about!
They (mum and dad) have gone today, but we will see them again in a couple of weeks when we head up to Foxton for a visit.

Righto.... time to go do some work... Monday's are always quite busy around here, so there is no shortage of stuff to do today....
Hope everyone has had a good weekend, and I'd just like to say THANKS again to everyone for putting up with my constant bitching and complaining over the past few months!
I didn't realise how negatively I was looking at life until recently, and I've now come to the conclusion that it is just too short to be unhappy all the time....
My advice??
If you are struggling - ask for help.... it does wonders :)