Wednesday 11th May 2011

It's funny, I thought that while I was on maternity leave, I would be updating my blog constantly!

The truth of the matter is though, is that my life revolves around this tiny person who totally relies on me for everything, and the days seem to just get away from me...

Plus, I have nothing to talk about!

OK - maybe I do have things to talk about, but yanno.... some days I just can't be arsed doing anything, and blogging is the last thing on my mind!

It's Rhian's 7th birthday on Friday, she is having a party on Saturday.

I can't believe my "baby" is turning 7!

Where the hell has the time gone to??

Some days I look at her and don't recognise her! I still think of her as a little girl, and although I know that 7 is still "little", she is growing up way too fast!!!

For her party this year, she wanted to go to The Swish Dish (a "hands on" ceramic painting shop) with some friends, so that is exactly what we are doing!

She is taking 7 friends, and after they have all painted their plate or mug, we will have party food and cake, then they will all go home again.

Now that is my idea of a hassle-free birthday party!!

Jaynie is doing fantastically.... she had her 6 weeks immunisations yesterday (although she is actually 7 weeks old) and was quite unsettled yesterday, but that was to be expected.

She seems fine again today - YAY!

Her sleeping has certainly improved, she has gone from sleeping for 1 or 2 hours at a time, to a "decent" night time stint of 6 hours!

She goes from 9pm through until 3am, so it is certainly a LOT better for me!

Although once she has done the 6 hours, she is awake every hour or 2 after that - so it's still hard, but a lot better than it was a few weeks ago that is for damn sure!

I guess the biggest news in my life at the moment, is the fact that I am taking Jaynie to Sydney at the beginning of June to meet her Aunty Steph, Uncle Chris and cousin Tyler.

I'm really excited about it all, and am looking forward to it like you wouldn't believe :)

Jeremy isn't coming, as he can't get time off work, and Rhian has just had her school holidays, so I am not going to take her out of school for another week, so it is just me and the baby!

I'm either completely nuts, or very brave! hehehehe.....

As for the "diet".... well......... ummmmm....................yeah :(

Instead of the numbers coming down ont he scales, they seem to have gone UP over the past 2 weeks!

2 kgs in fact!

I'm not happy, but then again - I have no one else to blame for it except myself!

I have discovered that I can once again eat carbs, and although I can't eat the amount that I used to eat prior to surgery, I can still munch my way through a scone or a roll or a couple of slices of toast in one sitting.

Now I know that in itself isn't "that bad", but the thing that is bad, is when the carbs creep back in to every meal, then they become every meal instead of protein!!
Quite often, I will find myself having toast from breakfast, toast fro lunch and then pasta or a rice based dish for dinner, with very VERY little protein.

Anyone who has had WLS will know that this is a MAJOR no no!

And I know for sure that it is affecting my moods and my energy levels as well.

It needs to stop, but when I am tired and hungry and the easiest thing to grab is a slice of bread and chuck it in the toaster, it's a bloody hard habit to break!

I NEED to lose some weight before I go to Sydney, I want to buy some clothes!!!!

And I know that I NEED to lose this excess weight before i go back to work (in 8 weeks for those of you who cared) because NONE of my good work clothes fit me at the moment!!!

ARGH!!!

I flatly REFUSE to buy new work clothes in a bigger size, because that would be like I was accepting where I am - AND I DON'T!!!!!!

Last week I was going really well with exercise, I was going on the Cross Trainer every night, but during the day, I was eating crap, so it was just plain stupid of me!

So today....... I start again!!

Cut the carbs, cut the sugar, get rid of the chocolate....

I CAN do this.

I HAVE TO do this!